Quickie Coaching Tip for Helping Clients with Self-Sabotage

Here is a Universal Truth that is important to know:

When you (or your clients) start stepping into a new goal, a new vision, a new belief or a new way of being, your ego will always, in one way or another, pretty immediately ask – “But HOW? HOW will I reach that goal? HOW will I let go of that pattern? HOW will I make it all happen?”

This is just your ego’s way of distracting you (read: sabotaging you), by demanding that you know HOW.

It makes you think you need to know the “how” in order to move forward. And therefore, if you don’t yet know how, you obviously can’t move forward.

Notice this when you’re helping clients.

Watch for when they come up with a new idea that’s really aligned for them, or get excited about a vision…and see if they get caught in the How Trap.

Then notice if you get caught in their How Trap along with them – do you run with the question and start giving them suggestions or start strategizing plans with them? (This is very common, by the way).

Instead of getting caught up in the How with your client, let your client know that she doesn’t need to know how when she starts. Lovingly share with her that she shouldn’t even try to figure out the how just yet. Trying to figure out the how prematurely will just stop her in her tracks.

Instead, ask her to simply COMMIT. Invite her to commit to her goal even if she doesn’t know how she’ll ever get there. Help her commit to the new energy she wants even if it feels impossible to shake the old one.

Commit. And then re-commit. And then re-commit again.

And help your client remember her DEEP WHY for wanting the goal in the first place.

Commit and remember the WHY…and in the right timing the HOW will come.

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