Last week, Yael turned one year old, and I spent a few days reflecting on how motherhood has changed me, supported my evolution…and totally revolutionized my business.
When I first became pregnant with Penina 7 years ago, my business had just begun to take off, and I was scared that having a baby and becoming a mother would stop me in my tracks. I was scared the business would just not be there after my maternity leave. Alternately, I was worried that if I did retain the business, I’d be working even crazier hours than the already crazy 60-hour workweeks I was working, because I’d be taking care of a baby in between!
Looking back, I have to chuckle at myself, because Motherhood has actually helped me grow my business exponentially and become a much more sane entrepreneur.
I meet and coach a lot of women who are pregnant or contemplating becoming pregnant and hold the same fears and anxieties about it all that I did. I’m always so excited to have the conversation with these women, because there is so much amazing-ness that can happen for your business when you step into motherhood.
Here are some of the ways Motherhood revolutionized my Business –
- I have much better boundaries: Having children made it necessary for me to cut back on work, finish at a reasonable time, put technology away when I’m parenting, and stop working every day of the week. Better boundaries have resulted in doing my work more efficiently, letting go of tasks that don’t actually need to get done, and having more time leftover for myself and my family.
- I am much more clear on my priorities: Becoming a Mother put so much into perspective for me. While my career and sacred work are still super-important and meaningful to me, being with my children helps me remember that family, friends, and time for self are usually highest on my list. This allows me to work just the right amount for me, enjoy more of my life…and most importantly, not feel tension around it all.
- I am more confident and intuitive than I’ve ever been before: The process of stepping into motherhood was very complex for me. At first, it was really hard. In all honesty, I was a sleep-deprived mess, and I started doubting myself and my decisions left and right – did I feed the baby the right way? Did I use the word “no” when I shouldn’t have? Was it ok for the baby to nap at that time? Not to mention there are so many opinions out there on the “right” way to mother – all of the information was scaring me and putting me into a tizzy!
I got to a place of such deep anxiety that I realized it was time to listen to myself in a new way, and to learn the next level of self-trust so that I could feel good about my parenting decisions and also act from a place of intuition instead of fear. This deeper sense of confidence and intuition has completely made its way into my business, so that I make better decisions, feel more at ease, don’t waste energy doubting myself, and show up even better for my clients.
- My mission has deepened and I am more passionate: Something about becoming a mother has made me more passionate about everything that’s important to me. I’m no scientist, but I do feel my hormones – and almost my DNA – got re-arranged by the whole experience. Nonetheless, along with now crying at silly cereal commercials, I also feel even more strongly about my mission and my sacred message and the ways that I was put on this planet to help others. I also think to become a mother, my heart had to get bigger. And all the care and love that I pour toward my children now spills over into the ways I take care of my clients and the sincerity of my desire to help heal others in the world. With this deeper mission and passion, my teaching is stronger, my marketing is more effective, I am more magnetic, and I feel more energized.
- Self-care has become tantamount: In the first few years with Penina, all the nursing and sleepless nights highlighted my tendencies toward not taking great care of myself, overworking and overstressing. (She was a colicky baby and toddler who almost never slept and nursed 24-7). Luckily, I chose to learn the lesson after that first year or two around how vital self-care is – not just for myself, but so that I’m fully present and happy for my daughters…and also to model for my daughters how to be a woman who takes good care of herself.
Learning how to take care of myself has revolutionized my business, because the better care I take of myself, the less I am a slave to my business and the more I’ve been able to put better and better systems in place. It’s also taught me how to receive support in a much deeper way, and as a result, I’m proud to say I have what I consider to be the BEST team in the coaching industry.
- Limiting family stories have washed away: Becoming a mother to my own children, for me, has meant that I’ve developed even more into my own woman, consciously separate from my own parents, and have been able to put down lots of old family stories and beliefs. For example, I no longer buy into the hold of my family of origin’s Money Story, which is deeply embedded in a narrative of lack, scarcity and the need to overwork. I’ve also been able to put down (mostly) a particularly persistent story about how our family members are perpetual Victims in life. Being able to release the old Scarcity and Victimhood stories has allowed me to earn a greater income than I ever thought would be possible for myself, and create satisfying success and happiness in so many areas.
So, whether you’re a mother or not, or becoming a mother or not, the bottom line is this: embrace all of the life events that come your way. They are given to you to not only become more of who you’re meant to be, but to strengthen your business in one way or another…if you let them!