I appreciate Mother’s Day in a whole new way now that I’m a Mother myself.
I realize that it’s not just about honoring my mother, but it’s really about taking a day to get the importance of being mothered – of being nurtured, loved, seen, appreciated, taken care of.
For some of us, this is exactly how our mothers mothered us. For others, not so much.
Here’s what I’ve come to learn: no matter how loving your mother has been, no matter how nurturing your mother has been, no matter how encouraging your mother has been, there is no mother on the face of this earth who is perfect. Period. Not even me (though sometimes I tell myself I am!).
In other words, none of us have found in our mothers the opportunity to ALWAYS be seen, always be heard, always have our opinion valued, always be given the benefit of the doubt, always be respected.
And because of it, as you grow up, you might feel a little unseen in the world, undervalued, unheard. Or perhaps somehow your relationship with your mother created for you the feeling that you were always responsible for her or your family, or that it was unacceptable to break the pattern of illness or addiction or lack in your family, or that you would be unloved if you became your own, separate person. Perhaps somehow you were told that you were “too much” or “not enough”. Or maybe the message was you’ll never REALLY be successful, or that you’re not attractive enough.
Whatever the story was for you, chances are there is a story, and that story has had a profound effect on your life and your image of yourself. READ MORE